Which direction should we take?

When was the last time you went for a walk?  I do not mean a power walk or one for any exercise purpose.  A relaxed and casual stroll where you notice what is around you.  No designation, just letting go and seeing where you might end up.  Taking time to stop and reflect, then clearing your head of any worry.  You might be amazed on how this may affect your spirit if you can truly empty your mind and let fate guide you to where you may arrive.

My only job in life is to pay attention.  Many of us tend to not live in the moment of now.  Bills need to be paid, kids need to be fed, items need to be purchased and etcetera.  Sometimes it is hard to go for a walk and even scary to have no plan.  If you let go and let fate take you, discovery and a sense of ease starts to appear.   The big weights shackled to your happiness become lighter.  As you walk you become looser as the tension releases.  Life is a gift that can be lived with ease and freedom from our everyday stresses.  All scenes change as the state of the mind shifts closer in tune with one's purpose.  Memories of feelings that are almost forgotten are still there.  I can not describe this and for lack of a better word I describe it as a feeling.  Something that was lost.

It is not selfish to take some time for yourself.  To take a break from your everyday life and not hurry.  Maybe you are always helping others in your spare time. Taking on too much or being taken advantage of.  Whatever the case may be it is ok to slow down and take time for you.  We are a race of people who are seemingly in a race till the end.  Letting yesterday control what tomorrow will become.  As you take the time to empty the thoughts as they come, your direction is guided without thought.  You may end up at a place that means a lot to you in some way.  Maybe it is a new place or a new memory of a place you have been before.  Maybe if you go for a walk like this the whole direction of your life may change.

The photo I took above is near a camp ground out of Mobile Alabama I stayed at for a couple days.  I went for a walk alone while my travel buddy slept.  There I saw a glimpse of who I had become.  I had been too busy even on my mountain bike rides to slow down till then.  I felt like a mule chasing a carrot on a stick that was always just out of reach for many years.  I never stopped to notice that I had chased the carrot through many gardens. Being focused on the one I could not catch I did not see the ones at my feet from time to time.  I try to share something that I have found that is great but it is hard to put into words.

Today I went for a walk and took it slow.  I found inspiration and a sense of calm that is very welcome.  I went and sat by the river on my walk in a park I have been to many times. This time it felt new and refreshing.  I let my past go and from there I walked with no direction.  With no plan I enjoyed the day by myself.  Being able to walk that far was rewarding after a six month recovery from a injury.  More importantly I get to pay attention to the things I find beautiful from time to time.  On a nice day go for a aimless walk and loose yourself with no direction. I highly recommend it!

                            Inspired by beauty, a woman and time reflecting on what might be.

Thinking back on my last trip to the coast, I went to the beach alone.  I wanted to take some pictures of the sun setting along the horizon.  It was low tide around the time I reached this place and the wind had calmed to a gentle breeze.  There were a few couples walking on the beach then and I was feeling lonely. On the other hand it was refreshing to see that some had found each other and were enjoying together an amazing sun set.  The cool ocean breeze was just enough to make slight ripples in the shallow water.  Then, I was trying to get to know a person I barely knew.  The reflection of a stranger peered back at me when I looked at myself in the water.  I believe that happiness comes from within and only when you truly find your own, you can share it with someone close to you.  A soul mate that I have yet to find.

There are many different types of relationships and there are successes and failures.  Sometimes people grow apart and sometimes things bring couples closer together.  I do not know the successful recipe that some seem to possess.  Expectations is a killer as well as getting too busy in the rat race and forgetting how to live.  In the process of keeping up with the Joneses the passion fades and the fire smolders.  Some can keep the fire burning and right sized.  Some huddle around fading coals! Myself, I am in search of a kind soul to share happy moments with.  I have found myself and that is the start of what I was looking for.  I do not know who may end up in front of me, if anybody at all. Maybe she is already in my life today.

I can imagine her today as if she was there on the beach that day.  I can see her eyes looking into mine curiously and with a peaceful desire.  The sun setting and the colours seem insignificant to the beauty that is radiating from her.  The surroundings are merely a backdrop as I notice the way she is looking back at me.  I would not know what to say and might not be able to make a sentence.  A glance at her lips and back at her eyes.  Walking again down the beach slowly passing others doing the same.  Enjoying each others company and nothing else really matters.  The rat race gone and the joneses enjoying their new possessions have nothing to do with us as we walk.  She keeps cool as the butterflies dance in her stomach.  I keep calm as I pull her close and kiss her.

This is how I might have enjoyed the beach with that someone.  I could keep writing but I will  leave that up to your Imagination.  A place at the coast where I needed to sort stuff out is the place I would like to take my best friend when I find her.  This is a story without a ending that still needs a beginning. Today I hold my head high and look through pictures.  How I felt when I took them.  I try to share them with a couple words attached.  In life do not be afraid to take a chance, find your own happiness, and seek out the important gifts life give us and share them with the one you care about. Tic toc the time is ticking away.

Darkness is quickly overtaking the light of the day.  The clouds reflect a final display of colour before all the light dissipates.  The blues are deep in the sky, a dark night is close by.  I climb into my sleeping bag and wind up my radio to calm my mind.  I close my eyes while listening to a haunting Johnny Cash song on a faint radio station.  Another day done, another day closer to home.  There waiting for me is a familiar face and a welcome smile.  As the cold creeps across the ground and the coyotes start chatting  I pull my jacket over my head to keep my face warm.  A lonely night as I lay  underneath a sky full of distant stars.

I remember taking this picture like it was yesterday.  How I felt that late evening and through the night.  I had a case of the blues and was missing my loved ones.  As I shut my eyes a spirit like image with a caring smile appeared. It was a ghostlike flash of my second half, with a loving smile looking me in the eyes as she touched my face. I could feel the warmth from her hands as if she was there. A meeting of the soles, a connection in a realm where distance and time does not exist.

The month I stayed in this beautiful lonely place I found a piece of me.  It had been long lost in the rat race, drowned by sweet liquor, stolen by hard work ending in a collapse of an economy.  Getting away and going where there was no phone service was the best thing I have done in years.  This allowed me to recapture what it feels like to be alive.  We are natural beings living a unnatural life in seas of concrete and green money.  Full of wants and the pressure of keeping up with the Joneses.  I did not know that there a part of me would die and I would awaken inside a gift.  A gift given to me and its given to anyone who is willing to seek it.  It rest at the end of a dirt path.

Today is the day that maters the most and is the only day that change can take place.  The sun is setting now and I am at home.  I sit here alone and and listen to the frogs sing the song of spring.  The familiar face has moved on and I watch the light fade.  Sometimes when you think a person will be in your future; they become a fading memory of your past.  In the comfort of a house I feel the deep blues in the sky turning to black as the sun light fades.  I sit and type these words and again I feel a loss and gain a strength to move forward.  A chill is entering the open window and neighborhood dogs are barking, distracting me from feelings, they seem to be a music to my ears.  I am a new man and tonight I look forward to tomorrow.

The earth is like a woman that is naturally beautiful.  If you tamper with her, you will ruin her.  If you treat her like a an object, you will lose her.  If you take that is not given, you will destroy her.  After she has been lost you try to embrace the memory of her.

You have passed a bench every time you have passed by the park during your busy commutes.  Feeling her slipping through your fingers you decide to stop and walk through the park.  There is a bench in the shade that is seemingly used not often enough.  Why is it that we decide to stop and live when we believe we are losing or have lost something or someone we really cannot possess?  The water keeps flowing as the feelings cloud all other senses.  Reflecting in the water is images of a role played, a insight to mirrored truths.

The cars passing on the bridge are drowned out by the sound of the water splashing against the rocks.  A breeze cools the soul from the fires of regret burning for so long.  The warm sun peeks through the tree branches as if to warm cold thoughts.  A glimmer of a memory of a selfless gift overcomes these regretful feelings.  Today is the day we take charge of our own lives.  We have the ability to see truths without pain to successfully be aware.  It is time to take time to be grateful for our lives, our loves.  In stillness the mind calms and the source of our lives energy is at our feet.

I have passed this park so many times on my busy schedules through the years.  I walked along this trail to get across town as a kid.  Usually to go to my favorite swimming hole down river.  One day I stopped and sat on this bench.  I found myself in a selfless way as I felt sense of wonder for our home.  Like a child lying in the grass looking up towards the stars on a hot summer night, a sense of belonging overtook my everyday routine.  Memories of a early relationship entered my peaceful solitude while I sat and gazed at the water.  My heart was broken when it ended years ago.  I do not know why feelings came back and why I felt fear as my thoughts shifted towards climate change.  .

Feeling the regret of words I could not take back out of anger I felt loss.  She was my world but I did not know me.  I took too much from her love and could not love her the way she wanted me to.  I could not spend any time with the one person I needed to and that person was myself.  I had too much fear so I was selfish and I took too much.  I thought that she was my world and I had lost her.  The fact is, I did not lose my world.  I was just starting to discover it.

I have had a very busy life and reality is it was redundant until change decided to visit.  A seed was planted by a break up, a loss of someone I could not possess.  A memory to become a tool for change. I was able to see my reflection and look myself in the eye. With the wind rustling through the pine trees needles the birds seemed to start singing.  They had always been there, I just did not hear them.   The beauty that surrounds us is as vulnerable as the woman I loved.  If I knew that I had enough I would not have took too much from her.  Like the world, if I knew what I was really doing I would have noticed her wilting. I could not see this cold hard fact in front of me.  I would have gave her nourishment to thrive not the poison from my run off.   I could have changed which would have made change then.  So today I have today to do better than yesterday.

Inspiration comes from within 

     Inspiration to achieve great things is only limited by your imagination, Influenced from a passion that differs from your everyday reality. Overcoming limitations and nourishing the idea that it is possible. You have to put aside and give away the fear of failure. At times starting from scratch has seemed reality. The fact is that you started developing your skills when you started dreaming and caring about others in you life. Changing direction has become a fact of unforeseen circumstances. This happens every day you wake up to a new day. Every day change takes place and observing this, your reality, can change any and all moments. 

     A possibility of true passion is unlockable if perception of your time alive is flexible. Reality is created in our own minds. The dreams and goals manifest as you walk the thin line of courage and fear. Using worry as a tool to predict circumstances and possibilities, courageously you develop a plan and feel ease within. 

     Envision the last breath of your life! Take time to predict your regrets and reflect on your accomplishments. Embracing your possible futures and your narrations of your past. To get to the beginning you must imagine the end and to get to the end you must continue where you started at the beginning. This has already been set into motion due to the skills and aspirations that started from you first memories. Practice this and you will seemingly without thought set in motion the beginnings of all things that are important. Amazing and wondrous destinies of anything and all that is possible in ones life. Your plan comes together as natural as nature itself and the paths you walk lead you where you truly want to travel.

     

     In Berkley just outside of Oakland Peoples homes rest on top the water. There is a  small pub close to the docks that has a fun type of entertainment. They have a band of pirate musicians singing sea songs. A couple band members playing the banjo. A welcome sound that I grew up listening to. You can tell that some of the locals go there a lot before setting sail or may never leave this bay and their small pub. I had a grin ear to ear watching the pirates play their music and some older people dancing to the rhythm. The food was good fresh sea food caught close to home.
     My friend and I stayed at a motel close to the docs and caught one crab that had to be thrown back. As I stood on the doc behind the motel where many artist have stayed, I looked towards some metal structures far on the other side. My friend Macsen with a glimmer in his eye explained to me that Steven Spielberg used those structures for inspiration in his Ewok that movie he produced. This made me wounder how Spielberg's mind can dream up a story by gazing at man made structures.  Being able to dream while he was awake.
     My short stay in Oakland was amazing and truly  inspiring.  I was able to visit a good friend named Rian which had moved there from Seattle a few years back. Both Ryan and Macsen had moved to big cities when young. I stayed in our home town to help my parents and then had a family. This was all new and surreal to me.
     Looking at this photo again, it brings back that newness and wounder I experienced here. It brings me a spirit of inspiration that I need to hold close so I do not loose it. How great would it be to live on a boat and explore new areas by sea? Or dream up a movie while having a cup of coffee and gazing across a bay.

Mirror Pond close to down town Bend Oregon